Today I am tired.
On days that I'm tired I miss you more than other days when I'm not tired. When I'm tired and I can't control where my thoughts go, they always go to you. Last week I was in DC on a class trip. The last time I was there, I was there with you. I could handle it for the most part. Except when my teacher asked how I was doing with the death of my friend. I shrugged it off, but as soon as we got back to the hostel I went into the shower and cried. I cried until my eyes were bloodshot. Then the Holocaust Museum, I cried more remembering being there with you than i did about the mass genocide.
But today- today I got an alone moment and I would have done anything in the world to call you. To see your face. To hear your voice. It is like when I remember that you no longer exist my heart can't take it. Even now thinking about it, I can't contain the emotion.
Graduation is coming up in a month and my present to myself is going to be a tattoo. I want it to have your initials in an acrostic. I'm trying out things, hence the subject line of this post. I miss you. I miss you so much.
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